Monday, 21 April 2014

Empty Love

Time for empty love
Give commitment; not mere love
Oh! Please understand

PS: Thanks to Haiku Horizons for the wonderful prompt - Empty

*Source: Wikipedia*
The triangular theory of love is a theory of love developed by psychologist Robert Sternberg. In the context of interpersonal relationships, "the three components of love, according to the triangular theory, are an intimacy component, a passion component, and a decision/commitment component."
Intimacy – Which encompasses feelings of attachment, closeness, connectedness, and bondedness.
Passion – Which encompasses drives connected to both limerence and sexual attraction.
Commitment – Which encompasses, in the short term, the decision to remain with another, and in the long term, plans made with that other.
"The amount of love one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components, and the type of love one experiences depends on their strengths relative to each other." Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three elements; for example, the relative emphasis of each component changes over time as an adult romantic relationship develops. A relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or three elements.
©       Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion. A stronger love may deteriorate into empty love. In an arranged marriage, the spouses' relationship may begin as empty love and develop into another form, indicating "how empty love need not be the terminal state of a long-term relationship, but the beginning rather than the end."

©       Romantic love "derives from a combination of the intimate and passionate components of love...romantic lovers are not only drawn physically to each other but are also bonded emotionally" - bonded both intimately and passionately, but without sustaining commitment.


  1. lack of commitment
    is not love- just animal

    1. Actually yes...
      But many times, we feel mesmerised ay being in love until the reality strikes...
      That there is only love and no commitment...
      Thats when we tend to move on...

      Thanks Rallentanda :)

  2. And Satya.. thanks for some wonderful lessons here... very informative.. and you know.. visit my haiku again.. you made me bring her back in the haiku there...



    1. Thanks a lot sir...
      For the comments here and bringing "her" back... :)

  3. wow! "Love" is actually theorized, stereotyped and classified as well? lolz.. never knew that was possible.. just one person’s theory.. Shocking as it is to me, for defining love is like defining "God" as defining means drawing the line and there are many things in this world whose boundaries cannot be drawn/defined like the limitless Space itself and "Love" is one such God's work of art. And why is love, commitment, intimacy, passion etc are considered separate/independent things? I believe they are all part and parcel of love.. I mean a mother's caring touch, a father's cautious embrace, a spouse’s passionate kiss, a friend’s warm hug are all gestures of love.. I agree that love is not just physical but it is neither just virtual..

    And the so called “Empty Love” – commitment without intimacy or passion; doesn’t it sound similar to paying a debt or offering a charity.. How can we call it love at all, for love encompasses unconditional care and compassion as well, in addition to commitment and why would anyone want commitment alone?

    There is no science to Love (like the psychologist who defined/classified love in wiki) and for the "science" supporters (let me mention something from my favorite show), you remember how the so called scientific world believed that "Atom" was the smallest particle possible once and then eventually they cut it open only to realize there is a whole chunk of particles like protons, electrons, neutrons in there and then only recently, they found out about the god particle in it.. all this discoveries took 100s of years.. so i dont think any human can define anything in this world for one thinks, all they see is all there is..

    PS: With respect, Satya, you are still an inspiration to write and your blogs still instigates my thought :)

    1. Kannappa, I agree to what you say...
      As the theory says, there are three elements for love... Intimacy, passion and commitment...
      Depending upon the intensity of each ingredient. the type and nature of love also varies...
      If you read the Wikipedia link, you would understand it better...

      Empty love is a love where there is love, but no desire/strength to commit.... Like this is about the love where love is there but not brave enough to commit...

      PS: Views can differ. And I am not offended

  4. Replies
    1. Nobody can empty oneself from love...
      But one can always escape from commitment!
      Thanks :)

  5. Real interesting take!

  6. You are truly turning into a Love Guru now :-p Got to take some tips from u ;-)

  7. love is a commitment. when one gives they have given a part of themselves. gracias for visiting my blog

  8. Beautifully said Satya, there is so much more to love than what the world can see

  9. Good. Wait for a full love capable of commitment. It's worth it.

    1. Lets hope that the waiting ends soon...
      Thanks Alice :)

  10. wonderful ! love your idea ! commitment is an action ,not a word ---my philosophy :)