Friday, 19 December 2014

If Not You... Then What

It was she who wanted to get rid of him. It was she who deliberately shooed his memories away.

And when he was finally gone, she felt a strange numbness. Vacuum spread within her. She felt as if all the colors have vanished and she started questioning the purpose of her existence.

There were no thoughts to make her smile or cringe. There were no one to clutch onto and no love to give.

There was nothing…

No dreams to see or no figure to idolize… No shoulders to rest and no eyes to dive deep… There was no smile that looked innocent… And no sunlight to spread warmth…

There was nothing which used to be an integral part of her life… There was no fantasy… No child-like and illogical love. There was nothing that used to be a part of her identity…

There was nothing to think about or write about, delve deep into or cry eyes out… There was no one to miss or no one to expect… There was no stories to make with a happily-ever-after…

Most importantly, there was no love to share…
There was no one in her life…

She felt strangely alone…
There was no one to understand and no words to make others understand…
How to deal with it, she didn’t know…

Will his presence make things better?



  1. Things may be dreary and dull without him.But his presence will not redeem the situation.
    A wise realization.

  2. She might have let go of him may be because she realised that his presence
    Would make things worst..
    Initially, these kind of feelings are common but very soon she may realise that if was one of the best decision she has taken...well written!!!

  3. She will find someone else soon.

    1. Maybe...
      Or maybe she would be happy with herself.
      Time will tell.

      Thanks SG :)

  4. Beautifully expressed! I have seen such a woman in reality, her thoughts are on roller n coaster ride for years, unless she accepts and is at peace with herself, it is tough.

    1. What you said is so true. It might be tough. But, is there a way out?
      Thanks Padmaja :)

    frustrating and sad :(

  6. ah the difficulty and the battle within. Have gone through these emotions once. Terrible!!
    You write well. :)

    1. Coming from you, I feel awesome!
      Thanks Red :)

  7. It takes a lot of wisdom to let go of the love that does not serve us well any more. Well written.

  8. I love these words ... strangely enough they give me peace ... Love, cat.

  9. This feeling to connect with another human being, the need to love and to be loved and to find happiness in it.
    Boon or a bane, couldn't get it yet!

  10. The perils of tethering one's life to another and without the resolve to let go?

  11. at times life is like that :D
    this too shall pass away na

  12. Well.. some relationships are strange that way !!